To My Birthday Boy

To My Birthday Boy,

Oh sweet boy.  What a wonderful, hilarious, joyful, exceedingly blissful year it’s been.  What do you think of your life so far?  It’s hard to believe that, five years ago today, I was just going in for one of your last checkups only to find out that you’d be joining us in the world a few short whirlwind hours later.

I hear people telling me, "They grow so fast."  Or, "Time sure does fly".  It could not be more true.  I cannot believe you're five.  FIVE.  A whole freaking hand, Felix.  How did we get here?  The things you can do, the things you know, the kindness I see inside you every day, it all still just surprises me in the best way.

This past year you have grown so much.  You are quick-witted, sassy, sensitive, excited and excitable, protective of those you love - especially your family.  You know so much and think you know it all.  You're learning to learn and to listen.  You want to know how everything works and why, for the love of all that is good and right, WHY?

You are amazingly good at using your words.  When you need something, when you like something, when you don't like something.  You are constantly communicating and I love it.  Your ability to relay your feelings is something you get from your dad and you are very fortunate for it.  I hope this trait stays with you forever and only grows.

Your relationships with kids your own age is one of my favorite things to watch and hear about.  You know who you like and who you love.  You know why you don't like people - they're mean, loud, angry, cranky.  But you have a hard time saying why you love someone.  "I just do."  It's so wonderful.  And I love that you acknowledge things about people, "She sure cries a lot, but I like her anyway."

Pokemon has made it's appearance in our lives and it seems to have made itself at home.  I cannot tell you how often I now think about what my third favorite Pokemon is.  It's a lot more that I ever have thought about it before.  You are obsessed, and I truly think this is the thing that will help you learn to read.  You know so much about it and how they relate to each other and what they can do.  It blows my mind.  And makes your dad so very happy to play it with you.  

This is the first year your dad was a stay at home dad.  You and your brother seem happier than ever.  And your dad is where he always wanted to be.  He is incredible, a warrior, a teacher, a protector, a comforter, a playmate.  The words "mom" and "dad" seem interchangeable in our house in a way we rarely see in the world at large.  Felix, you may never know how very lucky you are to be raised by your dad.  This man who is more a parent at heart than anyone I know, through good times and bad, he is changing the world for the better by simply being your dad.  Your life, your views, your experiences will be shaped by how our strange, socially backward, "screw everyone, this works for us" family is molded.  We're weird, kid.  And we love it.  

Your sensitive side has taken on a cheerleader type quality.  You are constantly lifting others up.  Like yesterday, when you asked me to make a Pokemon pancake and it was truly a blob with some chocolate chip eyes.  You looked at it.  You looked at me.  "It's perfect, Mom," you said.  It wasn't perfect.  It was crap.  But you loved it.  You said, "Mom, they're all perfect.  And even if it doesn't turn out the way I thought, I can fix it.  I just look at it a different way."  What almost-five year old TALKS like that?!

You're still a rule follower.  To the point of my pulling my hair out if I do something that's not EXACTLY right.  Like, when I make a decision without checking with your dad, you make sure it's still ok because 90% of the time we say that mom and dad need to talk about it first.

I think you’re a great, cool kid and the best son a mom could ask for.  Stay kind, stay curious, stay little forever.  Tuck in on the movie couch and snuggle your dad, brother and me for always.  You're my most favorite Felix in the whole world.  I know I say it each year, but seriously, best year of my life.  

All my love, 
Your mama

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